Tuesday, August 4, 2009

101 Affirming words

Even before Jon and I were married, I've known I have a problem with the phrase "Antagonism equals Love." Often times in my family, the more you're lightly picked on, the more it's shown that you are cared for. I've also grown up feeling that phrases like "You're wonderful at anticipating my needs." and "thank you for always holding the door open for me." are cliche and simply understood with outsay. It's a twisted world, but it's the Nutz family, and I'd never thought much about it....until I tried being in a loving relationship.

As a member of a marriage, one realizes how hard it is sometimes to know you're doing well at your job. It's brilliantly important to let your partner know that he's doing a great job at being my husband. So to surpise him, help him feel great, give him something amusing to read, and let the world know what an awesome husband looks like. I may not get to 101 in this post, but you get the idea.

1. He eats veggies. I don't. So at least our kids will have a good role model.
2. He very willingly cuddles with me, likes it even.
3. He is passionate about his work, no matter what he does, he doesn't take it lightly.
4. When we were dating, he was the one who insisted on taking things slow, almost painstakingly slow....but he was so right.
5. He frevrently reminds me to put on sunscreen.
6. Every morning when I tell him about some strange dream where our neighbors became fish and we had to watch their daughter while she toured France in an Egyptian costume with real snake jewelry, he listens and laughs.
7. He thinks my hiccups are funny.
8. He's willing to cook when I ask him.
9. He's a man who can admit that he once liked Clay Aiken.
10. My friends are his friends, and vice versa. He never begrudgingly socializes.
11. He eats nearly anything I make. And he thinks it's great.
12. He opens the door for me, even when he's carrying more.
13. Speaking of carrying things....have you seen his biceps?
14. He is a very quick learner. It only took him a couple months of marriage to learn to stay away when I'm in a bad mood.
15. He keeps a drawer of secret chocolate, as a back up for bad moods.
16. He can get genuinely interested in a TV show or hobby that I enjoy, if only because he knows I'd like us to share it.
17. He talks to God.
18. He'll watch old movies with me.
19. He's very open to try new things, and very open to not making me do so.
20. You know that scene from The Santa Clause (w/ Tim Allen) where kids just instinctively know to tell him their Christmas wishes? Well people just seem to know that Jon is a man to trust and talk to. Sometimes people just sit down next to him not knowing that they'll be spilling their guts in 30 seconds or less.
21. He's computer savvy. (who needs tech support?)
22. He knows EVERYONE! Though this gets annoying when trying to walk out of church in under 20 minutes, it can be extremely helpful when you need something.
23. He laughs at his own jokes.
24. He's very sweet when I take naps.
25. He's learned not to take mean words personally when he wakes me up from naps.
26. He readily accepts my appolgy for saying mean words when he's trying to wake me up from naps.
27. He easily recognizes when I need a nap.
28. He encourages me to take naps, despite the mean words that may come when he tries to wake me up.
29. He answers the phone while I'm napping, so I don't have to get up.
30. Miracles happen when I take naps. Often when I wake up the dishes are done, the trash is taken out, or the laundry is done....(perhaps I should nap more often?)
31. He'll even take naps with me sometimes. That's my favorite.
32. He wants kids someday.
33. He's willing to challenge me intellectually, even if it means we might disagree on something.
34. We share the same semi-concerned drive to be healthier, but not to an obsessive degree in which it becomes an unhealthy desire to be healthy.
35. He enjoys sleeping in....almost more than I do.
36. He's not afraid to have his mind changed.
37. He asks questions when he doesn't understand something I'm talking about.
38. He's not afraid to get his hands dirty....or his shirt sweaty.
39. He's devoted to serving God, in whatever way he can.
40. He went to a dinky musical my 1st graders put on, and stayed awake. Ever since he's held onto the phrase "herumph went the little green frog" which is amazingly funny...to us anyway.
41. He's anxious to improve.
42. He doesn't complain about doing dishes.
43. He's a good kisser....'nuff said
44. He has stopped wearing socks with sandals, if only because he knows I don't like it.
45. He was totally on board when I wanted to gag-gift some of my friends for their wedding.
46. He doesn't mind if I sleep while he drives.
47. We read together....so simple, but so romantic.
48. He turns away when something provocative comes on TV. Where most guys might jokingly oogle or pretend not to care, he has a genuine interest in protecting himself.
49. It only took him a couple matches to become serious competition on Wii Tennis.
50. Though he loves to play the Wii, he hasn't ever suggested our lives would be better if we had one.
51. He is not an impulse buyer. He wants things to fit into the budget. That's a great thing...trust me.
52. He genuinely listens to me when I have a concern...whether it's about the possibility of me haveing lactose intolerance or how worried I am about our credit card usage, or how I'm worried that my right ring toe may have been broken in my childhood.
53. He loves my family enough to worry about them, even more so than I do sometimes.
54. He can raise a single eyebrow. Sometime I've always wanted to do.
55. He corrects my verbage. I'm sure he'd edit this post if he could.
56. He learned to dance, just for our wedding. He hated most of it, but he did it.
57. He RARELY complains....I wish I were more like him.
58. He knows just the right time to suggest going to Moes.
59. He pretends he hates my silly jokes, even though he laughs
60. He's willing to do whatever it takes to do what needs to be done. He's never stopped or gotten discouraged on his long road to being a pastor.
61. He eats leftovers.
62. He doesn't smell up the bathroom nearly as much as I do.
63. I can count on one hand the number of times he's left the toilet seat up.
64. He reads. (Which is not to be confused with having an adaquate number of books).
65. He's willing to watch chick-flicks.
66. He has tried very hard to understand my various moods. He's deffinately getting there.
67. He doesnt twitter.
68. You can see his love for the Lord....I mean visibly see it in his actions.
69. The man rocks to Kelly Clarkson with me.
70. No matter how many old jokes I've thrown at him, I don't think he's ever gotten seriously annoyed.
71. Ditto for bald jokes.
72. He likes to take walks.
73. He still looks at me like he did when we were dating. I can't describe it, but it just twinkles with "Hi, I like you, I seriously like being around you, and I take delight in you."
74. He didnt' leave me during the wedding planning process. Any sane man would have.
75. He is always appreciative of my body. Despite fluctating weight, bozo ears, frizzy hair, smelly feet, etc....he has never once faltered on loving my body.
76. He's willing to admit when he's wrong.
77. He can strike up a conversation with anyone. ANYONE!
78. He has a very gentile and loving heart. But he knows how to care for people while still being concerned and reserved.
79. He enjoys sports. (I say this as an affirmation now, but that might change during football season).
80. That being said, he doesn't mind if I nap through a football game. He's just grateful I wanted to be with him for it.
81. He gets along fabulously with my family. He fits in, laughs with them, gives combat croquette a good try, and grew into them.
82. He is extremely low maintenence. Especially with gifts....That's so fabulous when you're broke like us.
83. He has an interest in balancing quality with price, not going to one or the other without regard for the future.
83. He can laugh with me about anything.
84. His first name begins with J. Long story, but that's a good thing.
85. He didn't care that I had boyfriends before him. He was concerned, but not hurt.
86. Did I mention he was a good kisser?
87. He appreciates my HGTV-esque attempts at making our apartment look liveable.
88. He is the perfect height for me.
89. He reads me well, and can tell that by this point in the post, I'm running out of ideas.
90. If I said that I had 11 more affirming statements to come up with, he would correct me and say there were only 10, and he would laugh while I tried to figure out how he was right.
91. He pretends not to be terrified when I say I want 17 kids.
92. He tells me how cute I look.
93. He actively concerns himself with how we can put Christ in the center of our relationship.
94. He can tell when something's bothering me, even if I'm not willing to admit it.
95. He's a leader.
96. He's sleeping right now. That means he's not a crazy insomniac like I am.
97. He doesn't give up. Even when he should....like on his poor little car. He perseveres through it, and gives the car enough heart to keep on trucking.
98. He racks his brain to understand the new words I create periodically, and simply chuckles when a new one pops up..
99. He's not afraid to ask the quetions that count.
100. He is not a professional eater.
101. He's as grateful for the end of this post as I am!